The specialist was nice, but with the language barrier, our communication was sparse. He was joined by another doctor who sat in, and the two of them chatted and pointed at the screen, meanwhile I'm sitting there trying to make sense of all the measurements and so forth. It was a rather lonely experience. True to form, Stephanie was unhappy about all the monitoring and poking and prodding, especially since he kept pressing on her head, and continually jammed her feet into my ribs.
After a million pictures and measurements, I sat up and got to chat with the doctor. Blood flow to Stephanie is just fine, however her size was definitely a concern to him. She is weighing just under 4 pounds (which is what Dr. M estimated as well). He thinks the problem may be with the placenta, but there's no way to test for that until after she is born. We keep our own OB charts here, so I was able to pick out "asymmetrical IUGR" (intrauterine growth restriction) and he told me that we should induce in the next couple weeks once Dr. M returns from holiday. I was sent downstairs to Labor & Delivery for another NST with instructions to return again next week. Dr. M will be back the following week, and I guess we'll schedule our induction for sometime that week or the next week.
I'm not sure how to feel right now. On one hand, I am definitely looking forward to meeting her. And it would be convenient to know exactly when she is coming. And I know that if my placenta is failing, it is best for her to be born sooner than later. But I feel awful that I wasn't able to support her properly. I know she is healthy otherwise, but I still feel bad, like I personally failed her somehow. I hope she grows more in the next couple weeks. I know that I am in great hands here and I completely trust my doctor to do whatever is necessary to ensure a good birth, and of course, I trust that it is all in God's hands.
I guess I'd better get on the ball and get all my stuff together! Steve has been nesting more than me. : ) He has moved furniture, organized closets and set up all the other baby stuff. I did get all her laundry done, but I still need to sterilize bottles, pacifiers & pump parts, and finish packing our bags for the hospital. No more lollygagging - I've got to get it all done now.
This is me at 34 weeks. She takes up every inch of my belly space!
Don't you dare feel like you "failed" her! You, of all people, should know that sometimes even though you do everything right, things don't turn out "normal" or what we had planned. I was so dissapointed when we first discussed inducing - but now, that doesn't matter one speck!
ReplyDeleteYou and Steve have already proven yourselves to be great parents through your faith, self-discipline, love, and perseverance. You have taken great care of your body and therefore your child. So, bravo!
Stephanie will be here soon, and, in the long run, the only thing that matters is her health and happiness.
Keep us posted as much as possible - I know you will be very busy for the next month or so!! =)